Watch Jon Stewart's Epic Chicago Deep Dish Pizza Rant
Let's talk architecture. Yesterday the Council on Tall Buildings and Urban Habitat decided that the One World Trade Center is now the tallest building in the country. Consequently, after 40 years with the title of tallest building in the Western Hemisphere—25 of those as the tallest building in the world—the Willis Tower (formerly known and still mostly referred to as the Sears Tower) is now the second tallest building in the country. Hey, not a bad run, right? Surely, that's nothing to be ashamed of. But as these drawings prove, how you measure the height of a skyscraper isn't quite as easy as you'd think, and some people, including our feisty mayor, believe that the council made a mistake.
Personally, I think the discussion is fascinating, but I realize that some people DO NOT CARE AT ALL, so let's get to the good stuff. As happens any time New York and Chicago are mentioned in the same sentence, the conversation quickly turned to pizza, and it turns out that Jon Stewart hates deep dish pizza more than any human being alive today. On last night's Daily Show, Stewart ranted for nearly three minutes about Chicago's most recognizable dish. Whatever you think of the pizza, this incredible tirade is a sight to behold.
You can watch the entire segment below (the best part starts around 3:50) but here are some of his best lines:
"Let me explain something. Deep dish pizza is not only not better than New York pizza, it's not pizza. It's a f**ing casserole. I'm surprised you haven't thought to complete your deep dish pizza by putting some canned onion rings on top of it."
"It's a cornbread biscuit which you've melted cheese on, and then, in defiance of god and man and all things holy, you've poured uncooked marina sauce on top."
"This is tomato soup in a bread bowl. This is an above ground marinara swimming pool for rats."
"I don't know whether to eat it or throw a coin in it and make a wish. And if I made a wish, it would be that I wish for some real f**ing pizza."
"I realize it is very cold in Chicago, very cold, it's windy, you need to be able to, I don't know, have a pizza and maybe cut it open and climb inside of it like a Tauntaun to keep warm."